Getting women in HH

[My Way]

All around I've been reading about guys paying for getting laid...
You pay this and that, you go there and there, you find the best girls for less money in blah blah.

Is it a local habit to always pay for sex in Thailand?
Heh.


I was asking because I would never pay for it.
Why pay when you can get it free?? Duh!
It's not that I'm not willing to spend money, but spend money to get laid is completely against my principles.

If all Thai women are out there for money, I'll just stick on Western tourists then...

[Bangkokney]

You must be very handsome man !!!

So you just ask a girl for a shag and she spreads em right ? wow I need lessons ...

or you buy her drinks, take her for a meal etc etc ... ?

We ALL pay one or another mate we ALL pay ... but those that CHOOSE to pay up front are pretty much guaranteed of a 'result'

I bet you being hansome man you never get rejected after a night out, or are all your 'dates' no different from a bar girl ... GET REAL !

And in answer to another of your questions OF COURSE NOT ALL is pay to play here, as I understand it around 1 % of the female populational (of age) work in 'the oldest trade in the world' here in Thailand


But hey! horses for courses ... if you find the bar scene offensive don't go, it's easy to avoid! Live and let live, don't knock those that do enjoy the scene. I personally find white women unatractive but I'm not going to knock your affliction

[harrypotter]

He he he ,like a pound for every person you used to meet in samui 10 years back who turned up proclaiming never to pay.All very handsome men , one and all, each one slowly ended up paying,one and all.Hows it going bangkokney give us call.

[SHADOW]

If you have a problem paying for it I'm sure you could stay in at night and enjoy your own company. Paying for dinner and a movie won't pay for school fees medicine for ma and pa, dept relief clothes shoes etc. I think before you travel to any country in the world read a book, you can't impose your morals on a nation, your high values don't feed people.
The rich get rich and the poor get poor, when you sit in your posh hotel sinking back a beer say cheers to the share holders in the west who get all the money.

[My Way]

I totally understand your viewpoints here.
Let me explain some thigs..

First of all, all guys can get laid here with enough skill (experience and knowledge about women) and having something to offer to them (It's ok to pay for dates, but if you start giving women prizeful gifts and paying for everything, it's kinda sad IMO.) that's the reason I've managed really well with paying really little or none.
I have something to offer that women look for in a man. I give them fun time when I'm with them, they feel excited, they feel protected etc. that's what women really want from men. If they want to get their stuff paid, it's not you who they want, it's your wallet.

Guys who lack skills and are boring here are usually virgins or they go in for a relationship with the same type of desperate women or they go for hookers. Guys who pay for sex here are minority and guys like me look them down really much since they lack determination and balls to learn and improve.

Bangkokney:
I'm not that handsome.
I never talk about sex, "it just happens".

I don't buy women drinks. I do complete opposite and they actually think I'm a different man, and get women interested more in me because of that.
Usually women pay me for meals, or we pay our own meals.
May sound little arrogant and all, but no woman has ever complained.

I've got rejected. But I'm not afraid of it. I learn from a rejection.

Only 1% are women you have to pay?
That's a relief.

Bar scene?
I really do enjoy the bar scene where I live.
Is bar scene usually for those guys who want to pay there??
I mean is there any women that are just for fun?
Hehe, I personally find Asian women unattractive


SHADOW:
I completely understand that tourists need to spend money.
But if two people agree to have fun together I don't think it's a question of money. That's my principle.
Since believe or not, even if not any money involved, women actually CAN have fun with a man. Especially in bed. The fact is women love it as much as men.

I AM going to spend money as much as possible for service and products of Thai people!

I'm not looking down on those women who want to get money from it. It's completely understandable that you have to run business for every thing that has any market value. I'd still rather support people who work in different business as shopkeepers, who make clothes, run restaurants, fish for living etc. and leave supporting the olderst trade of the world for other guys.


All I was wondering here that if I come of as rude if I'm not willnig to sacrifice much money for it.
I would personally feel really offended for if I'm not good enough for a woman and she wants money for it.

How do I tell to local women I'm only for fun, not for living?
Ohhhhh, now I see another viewpoint.
The rich versus poor!
Now that's a bad mix. (I'm not rich in my coutry by the way, I know what it's like to count money for food.)
It would be best for me as fairly rich guy in Thailand, go for those women who actually have money and do not need any support.
That's little more wealthier locals or another tourists.

I completely understand and agree that women use tourists needs to get money. It's not that bad deal, but personally it just offends me really much.


Any comments and insight is wellcome!

[buksida]

While I can appreciate some of your comments I'd just like to throw in my own two satangs worth:

Getting laid isnt some high skill or a matter of strong kung fu, its about a mutual attraction between two people. If you both enjoy each others company and find each other physically attractive then yes money will not be an issue and you will get your royal oats.

Welcome to Thailand.
Most of the girls that work in bars here go with customers because they have to, money to them is a means of supporting their family, children, whatever. I'm sure the ones that make a good living working the bars can pick and choose, and hell yes some even go for free

If money wasnt an issue and Thailand was full of highly educated successful career women then none of these bars would exist and we would be playing the same rules as we do in the west (and don't for one minute think the girl you're taking out to dinner back home isnt thinking 'i wonder what he does for a living' at some stage). They're just a little more to the point here as they have a lot more at stake.

I suggest you read up a little on Thai culture and Thai ways before jumping off the plane and right into 'kee niow farang' status.
Enjoy

[PeteB]

If I could remember what you are all talking about, I'm sure that it would be overrated

If I could remember then:

They're just a little more to the point here as they have a lot more at stake.

would appear to be spot on.

Peter

[ATAdmin]

Oh, you gotta be kidding me - I agree with everything that has been said in this thread, except most of what was said by "My Way"

I respect your morals, but disgree that I or any of my mates have any less morals for occasionally paying for it.

I most cases I would have written you off as one of these guys talks a good game who get off the plane with thier morals intact, and somewhere between the hotel and the bar lose them. Find themselves cuddled up to a goregous Thai hottie, half pissed on whiskey, and willing to cash half their traveler's checks for the chance at a roll in the hay with her.

You might be different as you 'don't find Asian women attractive' (wow, I haven't heard that in a long time.) so maybe you will stick to your morals, who knows.

It is good that you are only coming here as a tourist, because long term here would not be good. Enjoy the food, the beaches and the shopping. But you know very little about Thai culture, and though you will fancy yourself an expert on Thai culture after your whirlwind visit. You're not. Consider one tiny piece of Thai culture I am almost sure you don't know about - the Thai Dowry system. Unlike India where the girl's family pays a dowry, men pay the dowry to woman's family here. So paying for "it" is institutionalized in their culture here. Moreover, Thai hookers are not necessarily held at a lower caste in Thai society. Often quite the opposite - they can earn more money than their entire village, and they always share the wealth with the family.

Finally you misuderstood Bangkokney (I think it was him) when he said one percent. He did not mean 1 percent of the women in bars are hookers, he was saying that 1 percent of the eligable (15-45) Thai females are involved in prostitution - that's a lot Thai girls! As for the girls in the bars - I say that in many place 98% of the women in the bars are prostitutes...

Now your suave ass might actually be able to get a Thai girl for free, and many of us can and have. But I GUARANTEE you the only reason she wil go for free is because - for all the reasons you stated which are correct - she likes you. However unlike western women who may be up for casual sex, Thais 'usually' are not. She is going with yes because she likes, but also because you represent a prospect for future dating, hopefully mariage (pay that dowry) and to supoort her and her family. You will have only accomplished free sex and giving her a broken heart when you leave...

All in all, enjoy your trip. Stick to tourist women, and let us know how that turns out for ya...

[Bangkokney]

ATAdmin :

You and I have had our differences but on this occasion I cannot agree more with your last post.

Well put ...

[My Way]

Thank for your comments really much!
Did I sound that arrogant that this was a neccessary comment for me? "But you know very little about Thai culture, and though you will fancy yourself an expert on Thai culture after your whirlwind visit."

I honestly say I know like NONE of Thai culture, and I'm interested in it and I truly want to respect it.
In my opinion, Western culture has lost it's human values, it's all about money.
East is way more about respect, honour etc.

If I wouldn't care about Thai culture, I wouldn't ask these kind of questions here.

I understand that Western women are way more casual about sex.
And at least I should make it clear that I'm there just a limited time.


I think at this point that I really should see if it's about attraction or just money and make it clear I'm not going to pay for it.
I can offer couple of drinks though no problem.
And be very sure she understands what it's about.
Again, there MAY be little amount of women who are willing to do this and it HAS to be physical attraction.
By the way, this doesn't differ I do back here.
I do inform the woman if we are not going to be a couple and it's based on attraction.

Maybe the easiest way for everyone is that I concentrate on tourists since I know the Western ways.

By the way, my comment on Asian women is just based on what I've seen till this point. That means really little.
And I don't think there's anything wrong with Asian women either.
Maybe it's just that I like blondes little more than brunettes, that's all.

Thanks again for replies!

[bill]

dear my way: you are either a lying sack of shit or deranged. i worked on the truck docks once and the legendry otis a. smith, who i worked with summed up his personel philosophy on this subject with this " one way or another sooner or later you always pays for pussy." case closed.

[Bangkokney]

My Way,

It appears you are coming to Thailand and getting laid is a priority, am I right ?

If so you need to understand the following.

As a tourist there are not too many places where you are gonna get casual sex for free with a Thai and when I say casual re-read ATAdmin's post.

You can try some of the big clubs in Bangkok, there are a few where falangs go and 'norman grils' (normal girls/non hookers) hang out but be aware all those places will have more than their fair share of freelance hookers. Understand some office workers etc go to clubs in the evenings to suplplement their salaries, so what looks like a 'norman gril' on first impressions may well not be.

The 'Ministry of Sound' opened a couple of years ago in Bangkok with a strictly no freelancer policy and the place is now no more ... a VERY expensive misunderstanding of Thai culture is partly to blame for the closure.

I know of no places in HH where you find 'norman grils' where a falang will not look/be out of place. The locals on this board can put me straight if I am wrong.

Another thing to understand the higher class Thais often want nothing to do with falangs. Going to the extreme of the Khun Yings we are below them. A good Thai girl in many circles cannot be seen with falangs as they will lose face.

* Loss of face is something I recommend you research. It is high up on the list of Thai values along with confontation.

Be aware that even the better educated Thais ofen speak little/poor english.

The bar girls who hang out with the westerners are often the easiest to communicate with ! My girlfriend of 8 months speaks better everyday conversational English than my UK educated lawyer, fact !

Sounds like you should either be hanging out with the backpackers on Khao San road in Bangkok or on one of the backpacker beaches in Koh Samui etc if you are looking for causual sex with a 'westerner'.

I would go as far as to suggest that Hua Hin is not the place for you on the assumption that my opening statement is correct.

[Bangkokney]

THERE IS ANOTHER CHOICE

You can throw away your 'Christian head' (not suggesting you are religious but even if you are don't forget that the very fabric of western society is founded in Christian belief ... it ain't so here. I have told many before 'they ain't just a different colour!)

forget any preconcieved ideas you have and come over here and have an experience that will live with you forever ...

[Farang]

Phooey!
Leave the young and inexperienced know-it-all troll alone. He's trolling same themes in couple of Finnish Thaisites as well. He just wants the attention, not information.
And what would he require the info for? He knows it all allready.

I'm not saying he's stupid. I just won't accuse him of being an intellectual.

[thailooper]

Well said Farang - i've read all the comments and responses and briefly visited his web site - i would agree with you and most of the other comments about this flying finn's rather different if not alien approach to our lovely ladies !!! All I can say is "God help the blondes" !!!!